Vampires DON'T get sick
by thothlover
Summary: Summary inside. Complete!
1. Chapter 1

Author: Johanna Bella

Title: Vampires _**don't**_ get sick!

Summary: Alucard catches a cold, Father Anderson digs into his past and finds out he was a Goth (plus he falls in love xD), Integra and Maxwell get married in secret, Seras Victoria and Pip go out on a date and Walter is left to take care of Alucard.

Chapter 1

**Hellsing manor**

A loud sneeze echoed through the basement and upstairs, Integra looked up from her desk and raised an eyebrow "What was that?" She asked Walter and he shrugged, "I don't know ma'am. Perhaps we should go see?" He asked and Integra nodded.

**Basement**

The sneezes hadn't stopped but only gotten more as Integra, Walter, Seras and Pip had gone to the basement. They stopped in front of Alucard's room as the sneezes had died down, Integra knocked on the door and then tried to open it but it was locked, "Alucard, open this door. I need to speak with you." She said loud and clear but there came no answer.

Inside Alucard was blushing a bit, they had heard. What could possibly go wrong? Click he raised an eyebrow someone picked the lock?! The count quickly hid in the darkness and was fighting yet another sneeze that was threatening to come out. _"Oh, no. Not now."_ Alucard thought as he saw Integra, Walter, Seras and Pip walk in, to make matters worse Anderson would have to be there but thank **GOD** he wasn't. Suddenly without warning the sneeze came out and Alucard fell from the air and with a loud crash he landed on his chair and broke it. Pip and Seras fought back a snigger and a laugh that was threatening to escape while Integra and Walter gasped and ran over to his side "Alucard you're sick!" Integra shouted which made Alucard grab the sides of his head "Too loud.." He muttered "I thought vampires didn't get sick." Walter said as he helped Alucard up, "They **don't**." Alucard growled but it sounded more like a helpless mew. The count crossed his eyes and grunted, he sounded so **weak** it absolutely **sickened** him. There went that word again. Sick.

Seras and Pip to a deep breath and were going to ask if they could do anything to help when they burst into laughter and then ran out before Alucard or Integra or Walter could shout at them for laughing at Alucard in his weakened state. "Don't mind them master Alucard." Walter reassured him, but Alucard could hear the two laughing all the way up and out the door. He could just brake down and **cry** but he wasn't going to allow him self that. "Walter, put Alucard to bed upstairs. I have to run my errand. I will be back in a month." A month! Integra was going away for a month and was leaving him behind! "Don't go.." Alucard whispered so low it just sounded as if he had a sore throat. Walter nodded and helped Alucard upstairs.

**In a bedroom upstairs**

Alucard had tissues all around him and was tightly tucked in, it actually felt kinda good. A small smile went over his face then he shook his head _"What am I thinking! This, this isn't right! I'm not supposed to get sick, for GODS sake I'm a freaking VAMPIRE!!!"_ Alucard mentally slapped himself. "Oh my, you look worse then you did before." Walter said as he came in with a tray of … soup? It was bloody soup!?! He was a vampire, sure he was different from other vampires and could eat human food but he loathed it! "A nice warm chicken soup should do the trick to help you get better." Walter said as he came closer to Alucard only to see him bury himself deeper into the covers and refusing to eat it.

**Rome, Italy**

Walking the streets of Rome, Father Alexander Anderson was pondering. Where was Maxwell going for a month? Oh, well at least it gave him some time to try and remember his life. Suddenly a flash from his life ran through his head and the priest paled. _"No, it can not be! I was, I was… A GOTH!"_ Anderson thought and looked horrified but quickly shrugged it off, now to get some coffee or some sort of alcohol to forget that.

**Hellsing manor**

"Alucard! Get down from the ceiling please. You have to eat the soup to get better." Walter said as he looked up at Alucard, the count had managed to stay up there for an hour "Never! I'm _**not**_ eating that!" The count protested and Walter sighed. This was going to be a _long_ day.

**Somewhere in the streets of London**

Seras and Pip were laughing and having fun as they walked passed stores that were open 24/7. Seras had finally agreed to go on a date with Pip and to her surprise he just wanted to walk around and talk and get to know her better. _"He's not like any man I've met. He's actually being polite and sorta, charming."_ She thought and blushed a little as she noticed him looking at her with a smile.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**Dungannon, Northern-Ireland**

The orchestra was beautiful and the choir sang. The church was lit with candles and decorated with flowers. Integra walked down the isle in a long white dress decorated with flowers and holding a bouquet of red roses, the dress outlined her body figure beautifully. Her veil was down and she was smiling. For once she had bothered to put on make up, her lipstick was a lovely shade of light pink, she wore a light brown eye shadow, black mascara and eyeliner, the cheek powder was a mix of pink and red with glitter on it.

On the other end of the isle, Maxwell was in a black suit with a red rose in his jacket pocket and two priests stood behind him. One bore the symbol of the Catholic Church and the other the symbol for the Christian church. Maxwell was smiling as well, his hair in a slightly higher ponytail then usual. As Integra reached the isle, the orchestra and choir stopped and a beautiful wedding started.

**London, Hyde Park**

Seras Victoria was sitting on a bench gazing lovingly at Pip who was in front of her talking poetry. Oh how she loved poetry! And never had she heard them said so beautifully until she heard it from Pip. _"Never judge a book by its cover."_ She thought and then lunged herself at Pip and kissed him.

**Rome, Italy**

Father Anderson was in a church sitting on a bench and praying and repenting his sins from his child hood and asking for forgiveness. He had been there for the past five and a half hours and was almost done. Almost, meaning he'd be done in about an hour and a half. So many sins! He couldn't believe it. At first he had thought it might be someone else's life he had seen but not after seeing his father and mother in the images he saw.

**Hellsing manor**

Walter had managed to make Alucard come down and feed him the soup and now he was trying to take his temperature. "Alucard! Open up! It's not going to hurt and it's not like it's going through your ass!" Walter shouted and struggled against Alucard as he fought back from the thermometer to be put in his mouth. He soon stopped as the words sunk in and opened his mouth and had to try not to bite the thermometer in half, but what good was it going to do? "It's a special thermometer. One that can tell if a vampire has a fever or not." Walter said as he had been reading Alucard's mind. The count just half closed his eyes then a sudden beeping noise made his eyes widen in shock and surprise. Walter took the thermometer and looked at it, "Oh my. It seems you **do** have a fever." Alucard frowned and looked down on the covers, why was he feeling like a kid or something? "I don't wanna be sick. I'm a vampire for crying out loud, I don't get sick." Alucard mumbled and Walter looked up raising an eyebrow "Did you say something master Alucard?" He asked and Alucard just shook his head, "You sure? I thought I heard you say something." Walter pressed on, Alucard growled warning Walter not to push it just because he was sick. Then suddenly the count sneezed louder and harder then he did before that the pillows that were around him flew in all directions and he out of bed with his legs on the bed still.

"Oh my, bless you." Walter said, as he looked stunned yet he wanted to laugh but managed to keep it in him. Walter walked over to Alucard and helped him up, even with the count's **no**, Walter still helped him up and managed to get a **thank you** out of the count. A word he did not choose to say often; Walter tugged Alucard back in and put on some relaxing music (Mozart's Concerto For Flute and Harp In C Major) and almost in the blink of eye Alucard was relaxing and beginning to fall asleep, at that Walter left the room with the tray of a now empty bowl of soup but rather messy.

**Rome, Italy**

Father Anderson had only a half hour left of his praying when a young woman caught his eye. She was dressed in a long silver/golden dress with sparkles of glitter, her heels were white with rose bows on them and her hair was a long, loose, thick and wavy red color. He gulped and closed his eyes again, not seeing that the woman had been looking at him with her grey-blue eyes. Her lips were full and she had decorated them with a light red lipstick. She was wearing a brown eye shadow mixed with pink and black mascara, her eyelashes long and thin. The woman sat beside Alexander and began to prey as well.

As the beautiful goddess sat down beside him, the priest couldn't help himself but to crack an eye open and gaze at the beauty beside him. Perhaps it was time for him to quit the church and start a family? That thought ran through his head and blinded his vision, for he didn't see the fair beauty looking back at him with a smile on her lips.

**Dungannon, Northern-Ireland**

Maxwell carried his wife Integra into the suite they would be staying in, a smile played on both their faces. "I can't wait to hear what the others will say." Integra said in a rather humorous tone that made Maxwell chuckle "I agree." He said before the two locked their lips in an enchanting kiss that made Maxwell feel as if he were floating in the air!

**Hellsing manor**

Walter walked passed the bedroom Alucard was in and heard a sound that sounded like someone was choking, fearing that Alucard **might** be choking on **something** he opened the door and peaked in. To his relief Alucard was only snoring. At that Walter couldn't help but to snigger and snort; as soon as those noises were released Alucard snapped his eyes open and blinked a couple of times before looking towards Walter that made ice cold water run down the butlers spine. But instead of saying something the count fell asleep again. A sigh of relief escaped Walter's lips and he closed the door again. For a moment there, Alucard had looked very scary. To him at least, and where the hell were Seras and Pip?!

**London, Hyde Park**

Seras and Pip were giggling like some kids who had just seen something that wasn't so funny or done a rather **naughty** prank. In fact it was the latter, the two had just made love behind some bushes in the park. A snort escaped Pip as a cob walked passed and the two bid good night to the officer and hurried on back to the Hellsing manor.

**Rome, Italy**

After his prayers Father Alexander Anderson had had a talk with the young woman who seemed very interested in him. He had told her about him just finding out who he was as a child and having had to repent his sins and in exchange she had told him about her life. The two were obviously madly in love, but Anderson was a priest and he still hadn't defeated Alucard! But did he really have to? Nothing he'd done and tried hadn't already been done to the count before so, why carry on? He was never going to defeat him and that was very obvious! But the best part of this day was that he now knew the young goddesses name and it was, Maria Confetti.

_**(A/N: Will Father Alexander Anderson quit the church and marry young Maria? Which is by the way a made up name. Or will he continue in the church and try to vanquish Alucard? That my dear readers, is up to you so you MUST review! xD)**_


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

**Paris, France**

Integra and Maxwell were at the Eiffel Tower enjoying the view of France. It was indeed the city of love. The two held hands and every now and then they glanced at each other. "This is indeed the city of love and I am so glad we decided to get married." Maxwell said and wrapped an arm around Integra's waist and pulled her closer to him. Integra turned her head and looked at her husband "I agree. It's the best choice we've made." She said and rested her head on his shoulder as they continued to stare at the lovely city.

**Hellsing manor**

It was a wonderful day at the Hellsing manor. Seras was asleep in her coffin down in the basement and Pip was out shopping for groceries and other stuff needed at the manor. Alucard was tossing and turning in his bed as Walter tried to give him the same soup he had the day before. "No! I don't want to!" Alucard protested and Walter sighed in frustration "Alucard! You **will** sit up and eat the soup to get better! NOW!" The butler yelled and the count froze for a moment under the blankets, he sniffled a few times then sneezed and coughed "No…" "Alucard, I'm going to count to **three** and you **will** turn around or so help me god I **will** force this down your throat or add garlic to it!" Walter growled and the count's eyes went wide and sighed in defeat and turned around and sat up in the bed. With a frown on his face he looked over at Walter who smiled at him in victory and that only made Alucard frown more. Once again the butler was feeding the count. He didn't like this one bit! And for the first time in his undead life he had a flashback of him being young and sick in bed. His father by his side muttering that great leaders don't get sick and weak, then his mother yelling at his father as to not complain for he too was once in the same condition as Alucard was in now.

Before he knew it, the count was done with the bowl of soup and Walter had taken it away and returned as he had the flashback. The count was staring at the wall when Walter came back in, "Are you alright Alucard? You've been staring off into space for a while." The butler said and Alucard blinked and turned his head to Walter, "I have?" He asked curiously, "For how long?" He had to ask. Walter checked his watch "Half an hour." Walter replied and the vampires' eyes grew wide with surprise and then half closed; he leaned back in the bed and crossed his arms as he began to think. Walter took that as a sign the count wanted to be alone so he left.

**That evening, Hellsing manor**

Seras was talking with Pip right outside Alucard's room. The two were talking rather loudly, or so it seemed to Alucard who had pillows on either side of his head covering his ears and his eyes crossed and gritting his teeth. He finally had enough and jumped out of bed, literally, and opened the door and poked his head out "WILL THE TWO OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP! YOU'RE BEING WAY TOO LOUD!" The count yelled an order on the top of his lungs and bother Seras and Pip had jumped, then hugged each other and nodded while shaking and waving their hands around "Y-yes m-master, s-sorry m-master." Seras stuttered but Pip had had his voice scared out of him, then the two ran down the hall and passed Walter on the way down the stairs and then outside. Walter had of course heard Alucard yell, as his voice could still be heard echoing through the manor. "Not in a good mood today are we?" Walter asked as he had reached Alucard who still had his head out of the room, the only answer and reply he got was a growl. Alucard walked back to bed and Walter entered and handed the count a glass of water that had a strange smell, "I'm not drinking it." Alucard said and looked frightened at the glass, "It's not poisoned Alucard, it'll help you get better." Walter said nervously and smiled sheepishly, "No." Alucard said and crossed his arms over his chest and turned his head in the opposite direction of Walter.

Walter sighed and gripped some of Alucard's hair at the back of his head and pulled him back and poured the liquid down his throat and made him swallow it. After swallowing the disgusting water the count coughed and stuck his tongue out all the while rubbing the back of his head. "Yuck! What was in the water?!" He asked furiously and made a disgusted face. Walter sighed yet again but didn't answer the count. "Walter, tell me." The dark haired vampire said, sounding helpless and scared, "Alucard, like I said. It'll make you better." Walter said and left the room. Laying down further in the bed he stared at the phone as boredom started to take over, a rather wide mischievous grin went across his face and he quickly got the phone, dialed a number and sniggered as it began to rang.

**Rome, Italy**

Alexander Anderson's private phone rang and he looked at the number screen, but apparently the number was withheld, "Father Alexander Anderson here." He said as he answered the phone and heard sniggering _"I-ha ha ha ha-can't believe you picked up!" _A rather familiar voice said on the other end, Father Anderson's eyes widened and he growled "How did _you_ get this number?" He said as calmly as he could but failed as he only received more laughter from the vampire. He was about to hang up when _"I'm bored so I decided to call you up and see how you were doing love." _He teased and snorted into the phone. Sighing Alexander knew he wasn't going to get out of this easily, "I ain't your love, vampire!" He didn't get to finish his sentence because he was disturbed _"Then why are you still talking to-sneeze me?" _Alucard asked and sniffled and blew his nose. Now that made Father Anderson snigger and snort himself, "You're sick? Ha ha ha! A vampire lord such as you, sick! I thought vampires didn't get sick." The paladin said into the phone, struggling to keep his cool.

There was silence on both ends for a moment _"So?" _Alucard said as if he didn't care, "So. You should be _resting_ and not be on the phone." Anderson replied. The two talked for more then three hours and by the sound of it they were becoming the best of friends. "Now, rest! Or I'm coming over and I'll make you rest!" Alexander said and smirked _"Yeah, you wish Goth-church boy." _Alucard said and hung up, Alexander hung up as well then glanced at the clock. Good, he still had time.

**Paris, France**

"Maxwell." Integra started nervously as she looked at her husband doing some paper work on a desk in the hotel suite. "Yes, Integra my love." He answered without looking up as he put his signature on another piece of parchment. Integra swallowed hard, "I have news for you. I'm pregnant." Maxwell shot his head up from the pile of paper and stared at his wife, then a smile crossed his face and he got up and walked over to Integra and wrapping his arms around her, "That's wonderful!" He said excitedly "Really? I thought you'd hate the idea." Integra said and wrapped her arms around her husband back and slowly her face began to form a smile.

**Hellsing manor**

Seras and Pip had gone to the store to buy some things for Alucard to make up to him for being so loud before. They had bought him some teddy bears with hearts on them that read 'Get well soon!' 'We love you!' and 'You kick ass!'. Alucard found the last one funny, because he really did kick ass! Though the teddy bears were all the same color it didn't matter to him. They had also bought him some magazines and sweets. Alucard shoved down the sweets as he read the magazines and talked with the two at the same time. Suddenly he stopped and almost chocked on a gummy bear, his eyes widened in horror and shock. His castle had been turned into a restaurant and was now for sale! He dropped the magazine and looked up horrified, then suddenly he screamed as though he were actually being killed and Walter ran up the stairs wearing a pink fluffy apron and holding a toilet brush. Pip and Seras tried not to laugh and Alucard buried his face in his hands, Walter walked closer and then patted the count on the back "There there, it's not like it's being blown up." Walter tried to comfort the count but when he realized what he had said and was about to take it back, Alucard was staring him at with a death glare that could have killed a bird on sight. A low rumbling sound could be heard deep within the count's chest and Walter gulped and ran out of the room being followed by a very ticked off Alucard. "I'LL MAKE YOU REGRET YOU SAID THAT!" Shouted the count as he ran after Walter who was screaming like a little girl as he ran away from the count.

Unable to hold it in any longer, Pip and Seras broke into laughter and were rolling on the floor clutching their stomachs and crying from laughter, their faces turning very red.

An hour or two later the chasing had stopped because Alucard had literally fallen asleep on the floor and was snoring loudly. Walter had managed to reach and call Integra and buy Alucard's castle back, he'd be pleased to know that his castle would be used as a second headquarters should something else very wrong happen to this one. Walter, Seras and Pip all struggled with getting Alucard back upstairs and into his room and into bed. But once they had managed they all dropped to their knees unable to stand. "Alucard sure is heavy." Pip said as he panted for air, "Yeah, he is." Seras agreed wiping her forehead with the back of her hand. Walter didn't say anything and soon had enough strength to get up and leave the room. Pip got a very funny idea as he was now sniggering, "Hey, Seras?" He started "Yeah, Pip?" Seras replied and looked at Pip "Want to draw on his face?" He asked and Seras nodded in agreement, but at that time the snoring had stopped and Alucard was looking at the two of them, sitting up in bed. The two turned their heads to Alucard and yelped and jumped up and ran out of the room slamming the door behind them. Alucard nodded to himself and fell backwards onto the bed and fell asleep again.

Four hours later, Alucard was in his bed and starting at the ceiling. It seemed he slept more then he did and it was slightly annoying. He hoped he was getting better and not worse.

**Rome, Italy**

Father Anderson arrived at Maria Confetti's house. He held a large bouquet of red roses and a heart shaped box filled with sweets. Though, he wasn't wearing his priest robes. Apparently he had resigned and was no longer a priest. He walked up the stairs and ran the doorbell and waited. A few minutes later, Maria Confetti, the woman of his dreams opened the door with a smile on her face. He gave her the flowers and received a gasp of surprise, "Oh, Anderson." She said lovingly and he smiled brightly at her, "I want you to know, Maria." Alexander started just loving how her name rolled off his tongue, "That I am no longer a priest. You are the woman of my dreams, a real angel. And I, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I'll protect you by all means." He said in such a romantic voice that Maria had to lean against her doorframe. "Oh Alexander, no one has ever done that for me." Maria said, a tear of happiness running down her face, Anderson caught the tear and stroked it away and locked their lips together in a loving and passionate kiss.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

**Hellsing manor**

Alucard coughed and sneezed like crazy; apparently he wasn't getting any better. He could hardly speak his throat was so sore, for that both Pip and Seras were glad for and as was Walter.

The doorbell rang and Walter answered it and was rather surprised and shocked to see Anderson with a woman by his side. "Don't worry, I ain't here to kill the vampire, just wanna see how he's doing." Alexander explained to Walter and Walter nodded and let the two in, "Top floor third door on the right." Walter said and Alexander and the woman nodded and walked upstairs as Walter headed back to the kitchen.

There was a soft knock on the door and then the door opened, Alucard was so glad to see his new friend Alexander Anderson with his girlfriend/wife? Alucard wasn't sure. "Well, I can see you ain't getting any better." Anderson said as he saw all the paper tissues all over the place. Alucard just shrugged and looked at Maria, Anderson saw he was looking at his fiancé "Hm, Alucard, this lovely woman here is my fiancé Maria Confetti." Alexander said and put an arm around his fiancé's waist and the two smiled, Alucard nodded and Maria quickly started to gather up all the tissues, "It is not good to see you are so sick, Alucard." Maria said with her lovely Italian accent. Alucard tried to speak but nothing came out, the count frowned and rolled his eyes but received a pat on the shoulder from Anderson. Seeing his new friend and former enemy smile it made him smile, a little bit. Not long after Maria had cleaned the room and Alucard tried to say 'Thank you' but she held up her hands "No need to thank me, Alucard." She said and sat down on a chair and looked concerned for the count, "So, truth or dare Alucard?" Anderson teased and chuckled, Alucard gave his friend a look that he wished could kill at the moment and Maria gave him the same look. "What? I was just teasing!" Anderson said and messed with Alucard's hair, making it point in all directions, raising his eyebrow Alexander cleared his throat "When was the last time you took a shower?" He said and looked at his friend who looked away and made an innocent baby face, like a child that did something wrong but was trying to hide it by using a cute look. "Aw, so cute!" Maria totally fell for it but Anderson on the other hand picked up his friend, through him over his shoulder and began to walk to the bathroom.

Struggling and kicking Alucard tried to free himself but to no avail. He even tried to push himself out of Alexander's grip but he failed. "Maria, be a dear and run Alucard here a bath." Anderson said and Maria nodded and Alucard's eyes grew wide with fear and began to struggle a lot more. He didn't like baths! And he took one once a century or so. "Let…me…go…" Alucard struggled out of him as he kicked and pulled to get himself free. "Nope." Anderson gave him a plain answer and held him tight.

Four agonizing hours later, Alucard was clean but Maria and Anderson were all wet and tired. They had ended up washing the count, Maria had also ended up putting on clean covers on the bed and so now Alucard sat on the clean bed all clean. His hands were folded across his chest and he was giving both Maria and Alexander a mean look. Now all that was left was to comb the count's hair but the two knew the vampire wasn't going to let them do that without putting up a fight.

"Gees, Alucard. You're like a big baby." Anderson said only to receive a low growl from the count. Maria returned with a brush and a hairdryer. Alucard gulped and his eyes widened in horror. The two suddenly and very quickly jumped Alucard and Anderson managed to hold Alucard still as his fiancé Maria combed his hair.

Two hours later the three were fast asleep in a bundle on the bed. **((A/N: Alucard in the middle since he was the baby and had a rather baby like face while he slept XD))** Walter came walking in and saw the three and found the sight rather cute, deciding not to wake them up he closed the door again and went to find Seras and Pip who were very hard to find right now.

Maria woke up with a yawn and tried not to squeal at the adorable sight before her. Alucard had a foot over Anderson and an arm, while Anderson was pretty much fast asleep beneath those two limbs from the vampire. And to top it off, Alucard was snoring and so was Anderson, with his thumb in his mouth. Maria wished she had a camera, then remembered she had one in her purse so she took it out and took a picture. Giggling she walked out of the room and showed Walter, Seras and Pip the picture and then the four joined in a well enjoyed laugh, that caused stomach pains and headaches and teary eyes.

An hour later Anderson woke up and had ended up rolling Alucard of off him with much grumbling and low cursing. The only response Alucard gave was a loud snore and so Alexander had ended up laying the count face down on the pillow. Half an hour later Alucard woke up with feathers in his mouth and in his hair, "What the?" He said tiredly and shook his head, the feathers not leaving his hair. As Alucard walked around the manor, he noticed he was home alone. He smirked and went into the kitchen and started to look for the chocolate-smarties-chip cookies. Eventually he found at least forty boxes and had a bright mischievous look on his face with a wide wicked smile. "Mine, all mine!" He whispered victorious and attacked the boxes.

"Do you think Alucard is awake?" Maria asked as she got in through the front door holding two bags of groceries. Anderson soon followed and shrugged "I don't know." He said and then Walter came tumbling after, literally. He thanked the two for coming with him shopping and as they entered the kitchen the first thing that came out of Walter's mouth was "Holy shit. He found the bloody boxes." Maria looked dumbfounded at the mess; she was a woman who couldn't take mess, which should have proven itself when she cleaned the tissue papers in Alucard's room. Suddenly a blur went passed them and a giggle. "Alucard, I order you to stop and-" "No way! You're gonna make me clean it up! NEVER!" Walter was interrupted by Alucard's protest, which sounded rather childish. The butler sighed and placed the bags he was holding on the kitchen table, as did Anderson and Maria, then Alexander and Walter went looking for Alucard while Maria was cleaning up the mess after Alucard in the kitchen. Devious laughter could be heard echoing throughout the manor but every time they were close to getting the count; he always seemed to disappear! "Heh, you can't find me!" Alucard mused.

Six hours later, Walter walked into Alucard's bedroom to find him sprawled out on the bed clutching his head and groaning in pain, "That should teach you not to eat so many cookies, or any cookies for that matter." The butler said and turned around "I'll be right back with some painkillers for you and a glass of water. "Cookies…" Alucard muttered before Walter got a chance to leave "No, no more cookies for you!" The butler said harshly making Alucard frown.

A little while later Seras walked into the room to see her master look worse then before "Oh my god! Master! Are you all right?" She asked worried and ran over to his side and put a hand on his shoulder, "No, I need cookies." He said and she nodded "I'll go get some for you!" She said quickly and left the room in a hurry, smirking evilly Alucard knew he would get a cookie. A few minutes had passed and Walter entered the room with the glass of water and painkillers; he left the glass and the tablets on the bedside table and left again. A little while later Seras came back with a box of cookies with rum flavor! Alucard's eyes sparkled with joy and in the most happiest (and creepiest) voice he thanked Seras with a wide smile. Seras just slowly backed out of the room and left. Alucard gulped down the painkillers first and then the cookies.

Two hours later Maria came up with a cup of herbal tea that worked wonders on headaches and stomachaches, "Cookies." Alucard said as he sat up in bed and Maria shook her head, "No, Alucard. You don't want to get sicker then you are so no more cookies for you!" She said harshly and gave Alucard a mothering look (and a scary one that was) that made Alucard whine and lower his head as he slowly drank the tea away.

On the third hour Alucard had fallen asleep in a sitting position that made Anderson snort and put a hand over his mouth as to not brake out and squeal an 'Aww'. Alucard had one had up, still holding the cup of tea, his knees were up to his chest and his other hand was on his left knee and one of Alucard's eyes were open and his mouth was open in a silent snore. But as he turned to leave Alucard woke up dropping the cup and saying "Cookies!" He looked around to see a sniggering Alexander Anderson in the doorway, "I'll go get ya some cookies." The ex-paladin said with a snort and walked downstairs to the kitchen and got Alucard a box of cookies. "Yay! Cookies!" Alucard squealed happily as Anderson returned with the box of cookies, this time they were strawberry-chipped with a hint of cherry flavor.

**Paris, France**

Integra and Maxwell had a very good day. They had gone shopping and gone sightseeing and even gone to the pet store, where Integra had seen the cutest puppy poodle ever! But no matter how much she wanted it, she couldn't have it; she already had Alucard to take care off back home in England. And he could be a real handful sometimes! Okay, always! Only a week and a half remained until they would go back home to England so they decided to say 'Au revoua' **((A/N; If I don't write this right please let me know! In review please. I'm not good in French. I only know a few words…can't speak it though but it is a lovely language. So are German, Italian and all other languages XD))** to France and go to Helsinki, Finland. They started packing immediately and ordered two plain tickets and then were on their way, first class.

**Hellsing manor, rooftops**

"ALUCARD! GET DOWN FROM THERE!" Walter shouted as Alucard climbed the roof and took hold of the antenna laughing manically. At that moment Walter realized Alucard had some how gotten into the cookies again, but how? The butler turned to Maria, Seras, Anderson and Pip, "All right. Who here gave Alucard cookies, raise your hands?" He asked and waited. Trembling Seras Victoria raised her hand, then Anderson and then Pip. Walter let out a frustrated sigh taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes. Calmly he put them back on and looked at the trio, and then suddenly, "WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU GIVE HIM MORE COOKIES AFTER WHAT HAPPENED BEFORE?!" He shouted and the trio jolted, except for Pip who jumped up in the air and landed on Seras who hit the roof grounds face first.

"Wee!" The five all looked up and saw Alucard swinging on the antenna! Then the antenna bent and finally broke and both the antenna and Alucard flew off the roof and hit a bush of roses. Alucard had his face buried deep down in the mud with his feet up in the air and struggling to get out. Deep down in the mud along with Alucard's face was a family of worms, apparently Alucard had destroyed their home and they were now crawling/slithering into his ears and nostrils and mouth. To the count this was all rather funny, sense he was on a sugar high and pretty much more sick then he had been.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

**Hellsing manor**

"We're home!" Integra shouted as she and Maxwell walked through the door with at least fifty bags. _"We?"_ Walter thought as he went to greet her. He was rather surprised to see Maxwell there, "I'll explain as soon as you help us get the bags upstairs." Integra said calmly "And by the way, Maxwell's bags go into my room." She said and the butler cast her a confused look "Explain later." She repeated and Walter bowed and helped carry the bags upstairs.

To Integra's surprise Alucard was _still_ sick! After unpacking their bags and explaining everything to the others everybody was happy. Well, almost everyone, Alucard sure as hell wasn't. In fact he was sobbing over Integra being married to Maxwell and be pregnant by him! It wasn't fair! At least to him it wasn't; he sniffled and sobbed and cried and shouted. Seras was by his side patting his back and trying to comfort him with all her womanly understandings and what not. "There there master, it'll be alright. I'm sure it will." She said and then Pip came up with a rather large bowl of strawberry-chocolate-vanilla-banana ice cream, with sprinkles and some ice cream sauce and a cookie. Alucard blew his nose in a tissue and threw it in the trash, Pip handed him the cookie and the count took it and ate it slowly. Pip then set the bowl of ice cream down on the bed and sat at the edge of the bed, "Good lord, Pip! Are you going to eat that all by yourself?" Seras asked shocked, "Lord no. It's for the three of us!" Pip said and smiled as he took out three spoons. "It's not fair…" Alucard whined and then sobbed onto Seras's shoulder. She patted his back once more as she murmured sweet words to him to calm him down a bit.

Half an hour later Alucard had stopped crying (almost) and was eating ice cream with his two best friends, Seras Victoria and Pip! A knock came on the door but the trio didn't say anything, after a while Maxwell came in. "Look, Alucard. I'm sorry to cause you this much…pain, so I bought you a present." Alucard's eyes went wide and he spun his head around to face Maxwell "Weally?" The count asked as the spoon was still in his mouth along with ice cream, "Yes, weally." Maxwell said and gave Alucard a wide friendly smile. And as soon as Maxwell had finished his sentence, Alucard had jumped up from his place in bed and tackled the other to the ground hugging him. "What is it? What is it? Can I go see? I wanna see!" The count said sweetly and Maxwell couldn't resist but to take him outside (After Alucard had dressed up better so the cold outside wouldn't get him. So, Alucard was wearing a scarf, a wool hat, wool socks, boots, some very good winter jeans and a fur coat he had stolen from Integra as they were heading out XD) and showed him a red and black motorcycle. Alucard's eyes widened a lot more and he practically squealed with happiness and joy. "Can ride it?" Alucard asked with so much happiness, "Not until your better, I promise." Maxwell said holding a hand over his heart and another in the air. The count frowned slightly but knew he had to get better soon or else he wasn't going to be riding his new bike! So, the count hurried upstairs, returned all the stuff and went straight to bed and under the covers and to top it off he did all of this in the blink of an eye.

**Integra's office**

Integra was eating a strawberry cake with cherry frosting as she did her usual paper work. Maxwell walked in and smiled "You shouldn't be doing that." He said and walked over to her and kissed her cheek. "I know, but I must. I'll finish this and then I'm done." She said and smiled back at her husband. "I showed Alucard his new bike and he asked if he could ride it, I said not until he got better, then he left and went straight to bed." Maxwell said and chuckled a bit and so did Integra. "He did, did he? Well, I would be lying if I said I weren't surprised." Integra said and smiled and finished her paper, and as promised she closed it and got up and she and Maxwell walked out of the office.

**Alucard's room upstairs**

Pip, Seras and Alucard returned to eating the half melted ice cream in the bowl. It tasted better half melted. Alucard only wished his friend Alexander Anderson and his fiancé would have moved in or at least stayed longer. The only true reason for why he and Anderson were such enemies was because they saw that they had much in common and were both competitive and a strong need and urge to prove themselves.

An hour later the trio had finished the ice cream and now the bowl was on the floor whilst the trio played on the X-Box. They jumped from one game to the other until they found one that was very exciting and fun to play, though none of them could read the name of the game. It seemed to be written in a different language, one that none of them knew about nor could read. A knock came on the door and Alucard shouted a 'Come in' over the loudness of the game. Integra and Maxwell walked in, "Sorry to disturb you but we're going out to dinner, just thought you wanted to know. Walter will be driving us, and Alucard when Walter gets back you _have_ to listen to him! Understood?" Integra said crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow. "OK." Alucard said his eyes never leaving the screen and then the newlyweds were off.

Walter came back to find the trio still playing, "Alucard. I'm sorry to say that you need to stop now for you need your rest." He said and Alucard frowned as did Seras and Pip. "Aw, but Walter we're having so much fun. Please can't he play a little bit longer?" Seras begged and put on a cute face that Walter couldn't resist and let them play for at least three hours more. After that Alucard had to go to sleep. When Walter returned he found Alucard asleep and the X-box turned off, also Seras and Pip weren't in the room he checked. The bowl of ice cream was also gone. Walter could hear Seras and Pip downstairs and left Alucard's room and closed the door.

Right before dawn, Integra checked on Alucard to see the count drooling in his sleep, his hair a complete mess and he was half on, half off the bed. Integra giggled and hurried to get her camera, she returned and took a picture and surprisingly Alucard didn't wake up or anything!

**A month later**

Alucard was feeling much better, he didn't have a fever and his cold was gone. That could only mean one thing he was cured! That called for a victory dance in his own room in the basement with the doors locked so no one could see he actually danced a victory dance. He got out of his room and walked around the manor, then he remembered he could ride his bike. Oh the joy! The count dashed up the stairs and like a puppy he begged Maxwell for the keys to his bike and when he got them he ran outside and started his bike.

Six hours later he returned with a smirk on his face. He had caused a little bit of trouble in Liverpool and Manchester but that was beside the point. Alucard had had lots of fun and that was what counted the most. When he went back down into the basement he was met by a very unusual pale Seras who also had a runny nose and a sore throat. Not wanting to get sick again he avoided her the most he could.

**Three days later**

"I hate you!" "No more then I hate you!" Alucard and Seras were arguing in the basement. They were in the same room but in separate beds. Seras had made Alucard sick again. Integra, Maxwell and Walter all sighed and walked out of the room leaving the two vampires arguing and throwing pillows at each other.

**The end! Hope you liked it…I might just make a sequel to this story XD But you tell me if I should or not.**


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